Battle Arena Nintendo

Battle #26: Toxic Crusaders VS. Captain Planet

Announcer #1: Witness the return - due to a prolonged cocaine addiction of our writer- Battle Arena Nintendo! Please welcome our special guest Announcer, the Announcer from Pro Wrestling!!!

PWA: A Winner is You!

Announcer #1: That's nice, Bob, perphaps if you had studied English more in Japan and Hong Kong Americans wouldn't be mocking you sixteen years later.

PWA: I understand no?

Announcer #1: Yes, exactly.

PWA: TO-day fight on, bad Bandai cartoon pollution versues bad Turner cartoon saving the planet.

Announcer #1: Did you know that CP had 135 episodes? That's just wrong. And come on, both NES games suck.

PWA: Neither are anime. America cartoons suck my large hairless penis. This program brought to you by Grand Sponsor GLICO !!!

Announcer #1: (sigh) Very few Americans picked on that cultural joke. WATCH TV TOKYO!!!

TC: (signing theme song VERY BADLY): TOXIC CRUUU-SADERSSS! TOXIC!

Kawami: Our Earth is in danger...

Wheeler: Skip the intos, Linka finally said she'd do me!

Mati: Don't you remember what happened in that future episode when you and Linka had like, 1,000 kids!?

Wheeler: Dammit, you cocaine runner! we're not on Turner anymore and I want to show the commie bitch the power of free market vibrators!!!!

Asian Chick Whose Name Escapes Me: Guys! We must not figh; we must work to together to solve our problems!

Linka: That's just what I'd expext from a Chinese commie whose society destroys the individual for society. China has the worse pollution in the world and your government kills prisioners and maims corpses to sell organs on the blackmarket!

ACWNEM: That's something interesting coming from you, whose country has abandoned dozens of nuclear submarines at the bottom of the sea. Remember Cherneobyl?

TC: This is just boring, no Dr. Killemoff. Let's just get the gratuitiously busty girlfriend to play her accordian util they die.

Sluggie: But wait, if only ShadowMan024 had watched those horrible Z-movies that we were based on we could have had more face time!

TC: Give it up, nobody watched TC, that's why it was cancelled. We were competing against TMNT for Chrissakes!!! And Dr. Killemoff, he was based off the villain in the Felix The Cat movie!

Sluggie: Yeah, wait! Those meddling planeeters have settle their differences.

ShadowMan024: To avoid a potientially damaging lawsuit from Turner Broadcasting, I present a new version of the opponent: Captain Econ!

Kawami: LET OUR ECONOMIC SYSTEMS COMBINE!

Wheeler: Capitialism!

China Girl: Communism!

Linka: The Mafia!

Kawami: Famine!

Mati: Cocaine smuggling!

CE: When your economic systems combine... I am a bad T.V. program!!! Captain Econ!!!

ShadowMan024: Unfortunately, due to low ratings, his program has been cancelled before the Finale could be aired- following in the great tradition of American cartoons!

What We Have Learned Tonight:

Hi, Clawx! Did you want face time in today's episode? Well, you better get your ass from Canada and fly to the USA to gimme some head, otherwise, you'll never show up again. MWAH-HA-HA-HA-HA!!!